Thursday, March 25, 2010

AJ arrived 3/24 a little after 6pm

After 16 hours of labor, using cervical softeners, pitocin, and finally forceps to help get this little guy (actually big guy 8lbs 13.5oz) out, he finally made it. It was the hardest labor I've experienced but what else could I expect. This whole journey has been rough and I'd gladly suffer to bring my son into this world as safely as possible.

A.J. had a rough start from the beginning which was not a good sign. At first doctors didn't think he'd be strong enough to ventilate. After a few hours they did get him on a high frequency ventilator and Nitric Oxide. He took  a turn for the worse and they needed to give him blood. Things just kept getting worse so the doctors had spoke to me about letting him go. I had to make a decision after no sleep for 38 hours or food for 24. I told them I wanted them to put him on ECMO to buy us some time. I had really hoped these decisions wouldn't have needed to be made so quickly. The first ECMO machine they put him on had air bubbles, they caught it quickly and suctioned them out, however, it took approximately 40 minutes to get him transferred to a new machine. During this time he had to be revived with chest compressions and will likely suffer brain damage. The only good news so far is that he is on the new ECMO and all the numbers look great. However this was a temporary ECMO so sometime today they will need to transfer him to a permanent one. He is at high risk for bleeding in the brain so they will be doing ultra sounds regularly to check on that. This has been an hour by hour process with many bumps in the road. I still haven't slept much as one could imagine but I hope to have some one on one time with AJ today to connect with him spiritually. I want to do what is best for him and I still feel there is HOPE!

Here is a picture of Austin Josiah, my hero, before ECMO....

Here is our first picture together while he's hooked up to ECMO......


  1. There IS hope!! There will always be hope and you have your baby boy and he is staying strong on ECMO!!! It is a very scary machine and the ECMO course is scary as well, but it CAN do wonderful things!! Never give up hope and know that I am praying so hard for you guys right now!! I will ask my angel MJ to look especially over him right now!!

    Many, many hugs and prayers coming your way!

  2. Welcome to the world Austin Josiah! He is beautiful! There is hope and I am praying for AJ and your family. I hope his stats look better today and you get to spend some time with your precious boy. Keep fighting Austin!!!

    My prayers and thoughts are coming your way!
    Tracy, Ian's mom from CHERUBS

  3. He is gorgeous!!!

    Lots and lots and lots of prayers being said for you and Austin Josiah! My family, CHERUBS Facebook Family, all our members on our forums are all praying hard for this little guy!!!

    Listen to your heart and follow what it tells you to do. If you need to let you... you'll know, without a doubt that that's what you need to do (speaking as a mom who did have to let go myself). Until then, fight for him, with him.

    Whatever we can do, please let me know!


  4. I'm so sorry you had such a rough delivery and then AJ had such a rough start. We are praying that he starts his road to recovery very soon. We hope you get to spend some time with him to spread those positive vibes to him. Hang in there!

  5. He is beautiful!!!
    CDH is a crazy roller coaster ride. We had all bad news from the Doctors at first too. Don't give up! CDH babies have survived after they were given the worst news while on ECMO or off. Miracle happen! Stay strong and keep talking to AJ he is listening.

  6. Hugs Nichole! I think you are so strong and are doing exactly what you should - fighting for every chance possible and following your instincts!!! As I probably already told you, my baby is an ECMO survivor and that machine really helped us get over the hump. Dakota has no side effects that I can find from ECMO. The baby that was with us in the hospital, Olivia, was told that she lost oxygen to the brain and would likely have brain damage, yet she is perfect today. These little babies are amazing and can really surprise you!!! The fact that his numbers look good on it is a wonderful sign!!! Keep fighting AJ!!!! I am praying for good news from here on out!!!!!!!!!

  7. Welcome baby AJ! Keep fighting and fight fight fight. You are a mom and go with your gut! Also, pray and believe that God has a plan for you and AJ. He is beautiful and you are a wonderful mother!

    Prayers, & Hugs,
    Stephanie - LCDH Baby Niklas Isaac due 7/2010

  8. Fight the good fight AJ! You've got lots of people praying for you.
    mom to Jack, LCDH & ECMO survivor

  9. Such a handsome man! Sending thoughts, prayers and lung function chants!

  10. Hang in there. He is beautiful and you will be amazed at how strong these little guys are. I look at my daughter and she is stronger then I will ever be, (she had a left sided and midline CDH). Our thoughts and prayers are with you.

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  12. Sorry, I accidentally deleted my comment...this is what I wrote: Praying really hard for all of you! He's so handsome! Jaime was born with right-sided CDH, and a .71 LHR with a 20% chance of survival. He'll be turning 1 in April. Miracles do happen! :)
    Big hugs,

  13. Nikki...I have no words that will comfort you in losing AJ but remember God does not give us what we can not handle & he chose you to be AJ's mom, to love him & carry him into this world & to love him unconditionally while he was here. He couldn't have had a better mom! You are a strong, courageous woman, friend daughter & mother & my heart goes out to you. I'm here for you girl...when you're ready! I love you!